“The Lady with Full Cups” (Part 4)

The Dawn of Self-Awakening: Embracing the Inner Universe

August 26, 2024—this day marks a pivotal moment in my life. Today, I feel a sense of freedom, happiness, and completeness that I’ve never experienced before. It’s as though I’ve become the embodiment of a tarot card—“The Lady with Full Cups.” In tarot, the Cups represent emotions, intuition, and relationships. To have all your cups full is to be emotionally fulfilled, deeply connected to your inner self, and at peace with the universe. This is how I feel today, and I finally understand why I call myself ‘Ees Yug Ki Rati.’

This realization came to me as I connected with my inner child, feeling safe and at home in my own skin for the first time. I’ve made peace with my past—my mistakes, losses, and hurts. I’ve embraced my feelings, even my sexual energy, as though the Divine Mother herself is cradling me in her arms. I cried, not with tears, but with a deep, soulful release as the cold wind touched my soul, reminding me of the harsh truths of our Gen-Z culture. It’s a truth I’ve come to know—one that doesn’t require any external substances to feel the ecstatic, blissful vibes that now surround me.

There’s a powerful reason why I consider myself the Rati of this age. The time has come to settle ancient karmic debts and bring an end to the cycles that have persisted through countless eras. It’s clear to me now that I am the black sheep of my family, destined to bear the responsibilities and duties of two families. Mahadev himself has broken me, guided me, and even allowed me to be maligned, but always with the call to surrender to my fate. He offers me two choices: walk the hard path that will turn me into the Kohinoor of the universe, or succumb to the easier, more manipulated path shaped by the rigid perspectives of friends, family, and society. The latter will always leave me feeling like I’ve settled for less, never achieving the delicate balance of masculine and feminine energies (Ida and Pingala) necessary to awaken the Kundalini, the serpent coiled at the base of the spine, through the Sushumna Nadi.

Friends, a special someone once told me how lucky I was to be born poor!. Think about it—if I had been born into a wealthy family, would life have made me as emotionally strong as I am today? The difficult circumstances I’ve faced, the blessed poor days of my family, taught me to forget the past and move forward. Life is precious, and I can now fully accept this truth. There was a time when I took my life for granted and hurt myself, but it’s equally true that the relationships formed in this life, despite their ego-driven conflicts, are watched over by the Supreme Father, who is egoless. He holds us in the chaos and protects us from dangers beyond our human comprehension.

On the mystical night of Janmashtami, I experienced synchronicities with my friends, Stephanie and Nishta, that deepened our love for the divine pair, Radha and Krishna. As I finished my tasks at work, I felt a growing excitement to dress up like Radha and visit ISKCON with the first rays of the golden sun.

On my way to the metro, I bought eight (8) pink roses and one red rose for a reason—the first eight who join my birthday celebration to support my six-month (plus three) vow of no male contact (father, brother, boyfriend, male friends, etc.) will become my close circle. These two girls, Stephanie and Nishta, are my loves, so they don’t fall into this category. The craziest part is that I imagined the red rose would be taken by the one Krishna chooses for me 😂. It seems He can’t bear to see me love anyone else 😁, as the alignment of the Rohini Nakshatra has lifted me to new dimensions. This is my time of success, breaking generational curses, patterns, and karmic debts. The cool winds of Mother Earth whispered to me today, reminding me that all stops with me here.

As I returned home to complete my blog and spend time with my small family, I felt a surge of love that could only come from being broken and finding peace in this age. The universe contains everything; it’s up to us whether we listen to our hearts or minds—but both have their pitfalls. 

This is why I urge everyone to care for their Sushumna Nadi. The entire universe within you will turn your body into a walking temple, filled with peace, radiating a peaceful environment for those seeking safety amidst life’s battles. My birthday marks the beginning of this journey, and I’ll share the process and ways to start anew this coming Friday.

This is my fourth blog, continuing my journey as an individual and an aspiring writer. Read and understand the context with human emotions, and let my life’s story inspire you to learn from these blogs and discover your own inner universe, for it is the key to success in life.

And in case you didn't see the glimpses of this my birthday celebration on this Janmashtami, feel it below!!

HARE KRISHNA  ╳   KRSN 🌹🦚